Dating Women – Dating Women Who Are Independent

October 29, 2009

Sometimes, women get the impression that men aren’t interested in dating them because of their independence. Now, just because women are independent doesn’t mean they don’t want or need men. It means they’re paying their own bills. It means they’re making life work on their own. It doesn’t mean they view men as second-class citizens. It does mean they don’t expect men they’re dating to come into their lives, pay for everything and make their lives suddenly better. And yet, dating women who are independent feel they give men a vibe that they’re not dating material.

Qualities of Independent Women

Women who are independent, but not feminist, take care of their lives themselves. That’s not to say they don’t have the occasional problems everyone has, but they make do. Like everyone else. Dating women who are independent should be a good thing. But yet, they often feel they scare men away.

Typically, dating women who consider themselves to be independent, but who aren’t feminists (that’s a whole other subject), don’t see men as below them, don’t think it’s a bad thing to ask men for help, but don’t think they need men to care for them. In fact, they’d love to be in dating relationships with them. Independent women aren’t necessarily the ones making 6-figure salaries. They might barely be making 30 grand a year, but she can pay her bills, go out and have fun and buy things that aren’t necessarily in her budget. How do independent women view themselves?

*Pay their bills themselves

*If they have credit card debts – or other debts – they pay them

*They have their own friends

*They fill time by doing things they want to do

*They don’t ask permission from other people

*They make decisions for themselves

*They take care of their cars – even if that means calling in a professional

*Intelligent

*Financially secure

Unfortunately, that’s not necessarily the way others perceive independent women.

The Way Independent Women Come Across

The number of times men say (about a woman they’ve been dating), “She’s just too independent for me,” is ridiculous. Most of the time, if you were to ask the women dating, they wouldn’t know why. They might have paid for the dates every once in awhile, but they don’t find that unreasonable. Maybe they went on vacation without consulting the person they were dating. Whatever the reason, they were too much. Why? Some common ways they were women who are independent are seen include:

*She flaunts her money

*She think she’s better than others

*She’s demanding

*She acts like she doesn’t need others

*She’s spoiled

Getting Past the Stigma

So, how do women who are independent get past this stigma without giving up the things they value? Even women who are independent like dating. They like the security of being in a relationship. They just don’t want a man who thinks he’s going to be her knight in shining armor and make life perfect for her. What can make men interested in women who are “too independent?” She can:

*Let him pay if he offers

*Saying thank you when the man you’re dating pays

*If you’re having sex, make sure both of you are enjoying it

*Let him hold the door open for you if you want

Men dating independent women should:

*Let her make the decisions that affect her life

*Take charge in the dating life, but let her contribute

*If she offers to pay, let her, or say, “You did last time, now it’s my turn”

*Offer help in areas you excel – cars, finances, pets

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